mid-month check in

I just got my mid-month paycheque and updated my June budget. Here's where I stand.

I am $236.29 over budget. I obliterated my clothing budget of $100, and spent $423.42. My $25 budget for electronics didn't last long (thank you, Sims 3 and 2GB of RAM failing) as I spent $93.19. The house care budget sat at $15, but I spent $68.78. Basically all of that is chalked up to unexpected move-in expenses. As for eating out, I went $64.83 over budget, spending $104.83. The majority of that happened on our emergency trip to the interior. I'm on track for groceries and gas, and well under for medical, entertainment, and beauty. Regular bill payments and RRSP contributions are taken care of, but I've only put $100 towards my credit card debt.

Well, pretty shocking to be honest. I know this month has not exactly been a typical one - we moved house and had a family emergency! In fact, one of my paycheques was small too due to a short pay period. But none of those circumstances should throw me off this badly. So, I'm going to cut back as much as possible for the next two weeks to control the damage, and move on. The good news is that as of today I have set aside my full July rent payment! I'm two weeks/one paycheque ahead of myself. I'm going to keep this going as long as possible!

i have a lot to work on

Yesterday I was running around town doing some errands - I'm now onto the stage of moving where you change all your addresses, update car insurance, that sort of thing. I'm also in the slightly awkward phase of trying to find some local spots to get everyday things done. In this case, I needed a tailor - at 5'4", I basically have to hem every pair of pants I buy.

After some googling and driving around the area, I decided to make the 15 minute drive to one of the local malls for a tailor. I reasoned that it's closer to work, so it will be easy for me to pick up and the hours are longer at the mall than at a small business. But on the way there, I got a phone call from J that was threatening to become a full blown fight. After hanging up before it got bad, I continued on, trying to stay positive. But outside the mall entrance, he called back - and it did erupt into a fight.

Now I'm emotional and frustrated. I drop off the pants at the tailor, and I was going to leave but thought better of it - I stopped in at the MAC store to update my info with them (I have a Pro card). Well, it turns out the best way to do that is online or over the phone. But instead of just leaving, I spent $40. I was upset, and browsing makeup with some girls was making me feel better.

I'm spending my emotions...literally. This is frighteningly similar to last weekend. I need to learn how to control this.

walking a fine line

Well, I "forced" myself to log into my bank account and assess the damage from the weekend away. It was pretty bad. A lot of it was on credit, so my mind is going to that dangerous realm of "don't have to think about it now". The rest of it, that is, what's left of my chequing account, is pretty good. I had enough to move half of my July rent payment into our joint account, and I still have several hundred dollars left to get through to payday on Monday. No sweat. I don't need much in the way of groceries and having picked up the last couple random things for the house this evening (broom - much needed, hand soap that we forgot to bring for some reason, eye masks to use at night because I didn't expect it to get so BRIGHT in the bedroom, more sunscreen because it's been intense the last week...etc etc) I think that most of that money can sit in the account and give me a head start on the bill payments that will be coming in shortly. All my bills seem to arrive around the middle of the month, and that times out well with my mid-month paycheque, leaving my end of month paycheque for rent.

One piece of semi-bad mail arrived yesterday - a letter informing me that I no longer qualify for premium assistance for MSP. Sucks. So now I have to pay the full $54 a month. On the plus side, J is adding me to his benefits plan at work (we've been common-law for a couple years now), and his work will pay 20% of my premium. So I'll be back to paying $39, just now I'll give it to J - not MSP directly. We also sorted out our contents insurance and got a lot more coverage, plus a comprehensive plan for only about $5 more a month! We're getting a discount for living in a high-rise...something I didn't account for. So that was a great surprise!

Last but not least, this weekend we will go to our old apartment to clean it out and hand over the keys. And I am really hoping I can dig up the receipt for our dishwasher - if I can find it, our landlord will buy it off us for $200. That would be fantastic...so I'm hoping I've still got the paperwork. We're also going to have to clean out our storage locker and bring everything down to the storage here on site, so that's going to be a pretty tough task. But once we're through that, we'll be clear of the old city and able to put it behind us.

Frankly, I can't wait. I've been burning out this past week or two. First the job scare, then the NEW job, then the house hunting, then the FINDING a house, then the extended move, then the emergency trip out to the interior, then the cleanup. All this during some record heat AND the job is working me to the bone. I'm flat out exhausted. Here's hoping things settle down and I can get focused. Right now I feel like I'm sort of wading my way through this month and everything is uncertain. Not a good feeling...

the stress of managing

So, we're finally back online and moved into the new place. And almost right away, an unplanned expense arose, I got stressed and lost my willpower, and now I don't even want to begin to organize my paperwork and budget. Here's what happened...

For the last five days or so, there was a lot of eating out going on. I wasn't home to cook, and neither "home" was set up for it. Half our dishes were in one place, half our pantry was in the other. So I did a lot of eating in the car on my way from one place to another, and ultimately spent a fair amount (in other words, I don't know how much) on takeout.

The move went well - the moving truck cost us about $80 each, but we were friendly to the cashier and she went above and beyond by waiving the young driver fee (there's a $25 fee if you're under 25, and since the truck was going on my credit card, we had to pay it - even though I wasn't driving) and the second driver fee. So we saved $35, just for being nice to her after some really rude customers were in line ahead of us.

Once we got all moved in, there were the incidentals that always come up and that I really should have planned for. Like a step stool, because I can't reach half the cupboards. Or some drawer organizers, because they're a lot deeper and longer than I expected. And the list goes on!

So after about $50 at Wal-Mart for that stuff, I thought we were done. But then - the big one. There was a last minute family trip to the interior for a funeral. No way out of it, of course, and no time to plan. The travel and hotel expenses were paid for, but of course food was not, and we were there for three days. We took advantage of things like the continental breakfast, and renting the hotel BBQ to have a family cookout and save on the restaurant fare (couldn't do that yet again), but it wasn't enough. There were still a couple dinners out, a lot of Starbucks to keep us going, and things like evening ice cream in the park. It was a good time, but expensive!

And then it gets worse. I lost my will power. BIG time. I was stressed, tired, emotional, and mentally exhausted. It was hot and bright - that really intense interior BC sun - and I wanted sunglasses. I tried on a few cheap ones at a mall kiosk, but J (ever the devil on my shoulder) didn't like any of them. I shouldn't have let myself, but I tried on a few designer pairs and found myself putting $170 on my credit card (actually, J was the one who saw me hesitating and said to the cashier "ring them up!" and then I felt like I couldn't go back).

Still gets worse. I am (well, was) in desperate need of some appropriate summer work clothes. I need to look very professional, but the clothes need to be comfortable and sturdy enough to handle some serious outdoor work. Good quality dark wash jeans and nicely tailored golf shirts are usually what I look for. And I found them in a big big way at a Tommy Hilfiger outlet. They were having a huge sale, 40-50% off everything, and I just went nuts. Four or five shirts, a sweater, and two pairs of jeans. On one hand, this is good. That's almost an entire summer wardrobe of good quality clothes (jeans and sweater were originally $118 each, the shirts $56). And I got all of that for only $160. Not bad, right? It was a pretty amazing deal - but I just didn't have the cash. And I bought it anyway on credit. Then, continuing my streak of spending, I bought a $60 necklace. Granted, it's a gold cross that I have been looking for for about a month and finally found one I loved - but again, did I have the cash?

All told I did about $400 worth of shopping. Mostly because I was mentally down for the count and shouldn't have been anywhere near a mall.

So now I have to face the consequences and figure out a way to pay this off ASAP so I can get back to my original debt. Probably within two paycheques...maybe one if I'm really strict. And this is about the time that I start to get really wary. I saved all my receipts so I can input it into my budget spreadsheet, but I haven't done it yet. Bills will be coming next week and I need to be ready. I need to move half my rent into the joint account this week so I'm prepared for next month. I need to get some cash from J to put towards his debt with me (he's got three running right now - vacation on credit card 1, rent/security deposit on line of credit, and $230 of incidentals like the moving truck, groceries, house stuff etc).

And I hate to think about all this. I hate to actually deal with it. The dread sits on my shoulders for days, until I actually sit down and sort through everything, and then I feel better. All of a sudden I just feel a sense of control and security.

But even when I know that, I always stall and drag my feet, because I'm worried that one day I'll go to organize and pay everything, and I won't have enough to get by another month.